A friend asked me recently how I managed to hold my composure throughout my wedding ceremony.
She was getting married in a couple of weeks and was worried that her emotions might get the better of her as she walked down the aisle, or during the service. In the build up to my big day I had the same concerns. Every time I imagined my upcoming ceremony I had a severe case of the butterflies!
As with any W-day fears, remember that you’re not alone. Many brides before you have felt the same and they have floated down the aisle with grace and managed a look of serenity throughout their ceremony, without a tremble or a tear.
We’ve brought you some of our top tips to help ease any concerns and achieve ceremony cool. They definitely worked for me…especially the glass (or two!) of champers.
- Sister sister:
There’s nothing better than talking things through. Ask your friends, sisters or relatives that are already married, how they felt before and during their ceremony and how they kept their nerve – especially those that were the epitome of cool, calm and collected. Personal advice and reassurance from one sister to another can be priceless!
- Power of the positive:
Stop any nervous thoughts and images from playing in your mind. I kept picturing that I would be really nervous as I waited to enter the church with my dad.
Each time the nervous thought arises: stop! Visualize yourself sauntering down the aisle with confidence and vividly imagine how comfortably you hold it together throughout the service.
- Herbal help:
There are some fantastic herbal remedies available, which can really help to soothe your cares away.
- Let emotions run at the run-through:
A close friend, who also got married in a church, told me after her wedding (at which she was very calm and poised) that she managed to get all of her tears and emotion out of the way at her church rehearsal. That left her to feel composed and weep-free on her special day.
I had a similar experience. Standing at the alter with my fiancé showed me just how comfortable it felt standing up with him in front of everyone. I welled up a number of times too, which really helped to reduce any tearful emotions on the day. So, if you do have a run-through, let those feelings run-free!
- Here come the girls:
Have a little moment with your bridesmaids and/or your mum on the wedding morning. I was holding it together well until my bridesmaids brought in gifts from my man and a little letter that he had written for me. The floodgates opened! Thankfully this was prior to starting my make up! I had some great girlie hugs with my besties and my mum and that was my tears for the day out of the way.
Drink champagne! Make sure you eat breakfast and don’t have too many but, have a glass or two of fizz. It really can calm your nerves and gives you a little extra self-assurance.
- First look:
As I neared the church in the bridal car with my dad, all I could feel was excited. You most likely haven’t seen your partner since the night before and you probably haven’t spoken to him yet on one of the biggest days of your life. Just think about the first look between you as you walk up the aisle, him seeing you in your dress and the first moment that you get to hold hands and give each other support. Once you’re together, you’ll certainly feel confident that ‘It’ll be Alright on the Night’.
In the words of Frankie Goes to Hollywood: ‘Relax’. (Wow…showing my age now…quoting 80s bands!).
It’s your wedding day – friends, family and all of your loved ones surround you. They are all there to support you and they are feeling excited and privileged to be sharing your special day with you (and if they are not, they are not worth thinking about!). So, what’s the worst that could happen?
Even if you do get a little bout of nerves or a Cheryl Cole, X-factor styley, single heavy tear runs like a river down your cheek during the ceremony, then everyone will be welling up with you and willing you on.
Plus we’re all only human, right? You are marrying the man of your dreams, who wouldn’t be emotional or have excited butterflies about that?
I provided my friend with all of the above advice and my other promise to her was that on the day, you will just feel fine. Something comes over you on that special day and your worries don’t surmount to anything.
The first thing she said to me as I hugged her after her ceremony? “You were so right!”
Have you got the wedding ceremony wobbles? Or are you feeling completely unflustered and unfazed?
Have you got any calming advice from your wedding day for future brides?
We’d love to hear from you! xx