Friday Five – How To Be A Great Bridesmaid

25/07/2014 | 2

Being A Great Bridesmaid


I absolutely loved being a bridesmaid. I didn’t really dream about being a bride when I was a little girl, nor did I dress up in white and parade around the garden with a pillowcase on my head as a make-shift veil, pretending to be a wife-to-be like a lot of my friends! I did however truly long to be a flower girl, and then a bridesmaid once I was no longer young or cute enough to be a flower girl.


The idea of being a bridesmaid seemed hugely appealing; getting to wear a glamorous gown (I should use the term ‘glamorous’ lightly, it was the 80’s when I was young enough to be a flower girl!) and being such a special part of what seemed to be the best party ever, looked like something I would really enjoy.


Well, I didn’t have to hang around for long. The privileged day of me becoming a bridesmaid, finally came at the ripe old age of…wait for it…29! So yes, there was a lot of expectation on my end when one of best friends popped the question. I of course said yes, with tears in my eyes.


How To Be A Brilliant Bridesmaid

Images: Prestige Photography via You Mean The World To Me


At this point, I had no clue about planning a wedding. I didn’t know where my pal would even have to start or what duties and responsibilities a maid actually needed to deliver, but I knew I was brimming with excitement that my fab friend was tying the knot and about being asked to be her bridesmaid and that I wanted to help as much as she needed/wanted me to.


Being a bridesmaid is a real honour. You have been asked to play a major role in someone’s wedding and out of all the people they are close to, they have asked you! It’s a pretty lovely feeling. So, if you want to repay the beautiful bride by being the best bridesmaid she could ever hope for, here’s some advice on how to be a great bridesmaid and being there for your bestie through this special time.



Best friend forever


Be a best friend to your bride! If you are bridesmaid to a close friend, then this part is a lot easier of course. What a bride really needs when she is planning a wedding are caring friends. No matter how smoothly the planning is going, organizing a wedding on top of a full time job and the rest of the chores and challenges that daily life sometimes requires is no easy feat.

Brides know that their maids probably don’t want to hear every tiny detail about the wedding, but if you want to be a fabulous maid, do ask how everything is going, lend an ear and be supportive. Your bride-to-be will most likely just appreciate the chance to discuss her latest wedding stresses, what seating arrangements her divorced parents are now demanding or getting out in the open her serious worries about the seemingly slightly crazy band she booked on a whim on a stressful day. This is your time to shine as a friend, this moment is all about your bestie and make it so.


Top Tips For Being A Great Bridesmaid



Help! I need somebody


Getting married abroad can be easier than a creating a traditional wedding at home. If the couple has a wedding planner, then many details are discussed and booked over email without the bride and groom-to-be needing to source suppliers themselves and a lot of the challenges that arise are handled by the planner. This is not the case for all brides as many of fly away brides decide to fully organise the wedding themselves.


Either way, offer assistance as much as you can and from the beginning. Buy the bride a wedding planner book as an engagement gift, keep asking her where she is at with the planning and what you can do to help, suggest taking some of the items that you can off her ‘to-do’ list and be on her side at all times when you are away at the wedding. Being selfless is the best trait a bridesmaid can have.


Advice For Being A Great Bridesmaid



Keep calm and carry on


Be on team bride! If the upcoming nuptials are getting on top of your lovely lady, keep her calm! Make her step away from the ‘to-do’ list and go and do something fun together, with a firm ‘no talking about the wedding’ rule! Be her back up, keep your cool and be patient.


How To Be An Amazing Bridesmaid Images: Ultimate USA Weddings via You Mean The World To Me



Dress up


Hopefully the bride will ask for your opinion when it comes to choosing the bridesmaid outfits. It is a challenge to find one style that will suit and fit all, so be tolerant, give constructive feedback and if the final choice is not exactly what you would choose, still wear your bridesmaid dress with pride and a smile.


Be A Great Bridesmaid



Watch your words


If the bride has bought her wedding dress and you’re not that keen, hold back with your honesty, everyone’s taste is different and critical remarks are unnecessary. If the bride asks for your honest opinion on an element of the day, share your thoughts as she has asked you to, but do it more delicately than usual incase it’s something she had her heart set on. Carless comments could be taken the wrong way as the bride is putting her heart, soul and personality into this event, so tackle difficult topics with kindness and respect.


How To Be A Great Bridesmaid



Hen party heaven


One of the biggest roles for a bridesmaid is organising the hen party. Go to town ladies! Give your girl a day she will always remember and treasure forever. Plan things that you know she will love (not things that you will love!), make her feel more special than she ever has before and ensure she wakes up the next day feeling truly loved. Yes, very different advice than that for planning a stag weekend!

All of my friends have had and have thrown fantastic hen parties. What made them so great? They were full of special moments, personalised touches and of course cry with laughter instances….oh, and more Prosecco on ice than anyone should ever drink in one day and the obligatory plastic willy paraphernalia.


How To Be The Best Bridemaid

Images: Gypsy Westwood via You Mean The World To Me



If you’re not already married yourself, you will learn a lot whilst being a bridesmaid. I didn’t know why the wedding breakfast was called the wedding breakfast (the first meal that the newly married couple eat together), I didn’t really know the running order of a wedding day and I certainly didn’t know all of the hard work, emotion and pressures that can go into creating your day, your way. It really is a great learning curve being a maid!


If you’re already married, then you should be the teacher to your bride-to-be. Giving advice where needed, but do remember that everyone is different, so if you experienced any horror stories and nightmare in-law situations, it might be best to spare the bride from unnecessarily worrying about things that she hasn’t come across yet!


Of course, all of the advice above is assuming your bride-to-be has not gone full bridezilla on you! It is so important to be great bridesmaid but brides-to-be it is just as vital to be a fabulous bride to your maids too. Appreciate every moment of this special time together and don’t take everything too seriously, these times are meant to be treasured and enjoyed.




Comments (2)

  1. Kara

    Fab article and some great advice :-)x

  2. This is a greay article! I’ve seen many weddings where the bridal party go a bit mental and leave the poor bride in a lurch once the dinner is over. A bridesmaid’s duties don’t end with dessert so it’s nice to see an article about this topic. 🙂

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